I looked back over part 1 of this 2 or ? who knows how many part series, and don't feel inclined to follow the thread I left for me to pick up again. Well, perhaps I will in part, but not entirely. The flow I was feeling then was different than the one I am in now. And I posted that some 2 or 3 weeks ago. I was a completely different being then!
I do want to continue discussing these past 9 months since I first started the blog (almost a year now, the anniversary is Feb 1st!), beginning with a powerful lesson or series of lessons I have begun to integrate into my life, all involving the art of communication.
First, I want to define a really dicey word that is often tossed around. I want to define it as I experience it, or as I use it to improve the quality of my reality. The word is Karma. or karma. It sure is used a lot, & I honor however you (anyone reading this) relates to the word or defines it for yourself. For the purposes of this posting, I will define karma as anything that pulls me away from present experience.
I am experiencing this moment now. I am simply aware. Not thinking about anything, just feeling what I feel and witnessing the simplicity of the experience before me. But wait! My stomach is gurgling. It's saying "you have been treating me pretty well, but you could do better. Don't eat so much!"
I ate a lot of food today. Nothing too crazy, but still, enough to continue to experience this karma, or the consequences of this particular action. My tummy gurgles: karmic consequences. I pass gas: karmic consequences. Both consequences pull me away from the fullness of a dynamic, multi-sensory present experience. How can I experience the plane soaring over head and the birds chirping, and the sunset, and the wind blowing, and my bare feet on the grass and the sweat on my head and the music on the radio all at once when I feel heavy with food, when I feel heavy with anything that pulls me away from this fast range of experiences all happening at once?
Karma is a vampire-like entity that feeds on the energy of our present experience. There. That's it. These karma vampires have a life of there own, and continue to feed on our present awareness until we find a way to release them. Easy enough right? Anything right now that's pulling away from your full, present experience is a karma, so just trace it back to its origin a release it!
The food karma is one that comes up for me a lot, because I'm always trying to find balance, and eat the most healthy thing, or the seasonal local, or the raw or the super or the wild, or the blah blah blah. You know? If I drink the matrix-juice box loaded with high fructose corn syrup, then my body will be thrown out of balance and I'll experience the karmic guilt of putting that in my body, and so on and so on. So I'm always seeking balance with that.
But one reason I've had difficulty with food balance is because of subtle little karmas that are still in my body, exerting their influence over my appetite, telling me to eat this or that when I really don't need it. Liver parasites would be one example. I went and visited a number of health consultants and came to find out that I had liver parasites or liver "flukes," little karmic vampire entities telling me to put crazy things in my body to throw my liver out of wack and thus give them free rein to feed on me, my energy, etc. Crazy huh? So I've done a number of liver cleanses in the past months, and continue to be very clear and careful about the things I put my liver through, i.e., alcohol, overeating, sugar, processed foods, etc. And being disciplined with these things has helped me to tune into my body more and more, and find out what it really needs, rather than what the vampires need. And thus I experience an increase in present awareness, and henceforth a fuller life enjoyment. :)
Here's an interesting concept I developed after already publishing this blog posting. I feel it supplements the notions I've been bouncing around enough to edit it in, post-publishing. :)
Karmas::Present Awareness Feeders
Vampires::Energy/Blood Feeders
Mosquitos::Blood Suckers
And how does one repel vampires?
Garlic. Do you know what happens to your skin when you eat garlic? It radiates garlic essence, and a mosquito wouldn't dare come near you. It's one of the best natural mosquito repellents.
Garlic is also a powerful anti-microbial herb that has been used to treat typhus, parasites poor digestion, cancer, low energy, and a whole host of bacterias and viruses that have plagued people for centuries.
In Chinese medicine, garlic is a Yang food, a fire food. Fire, like light, like burning up vampires in the light, like burning through little karmic vampire entities in your body, bringing in the light.
Yah, yah, yah???
Other karmas related to the body could be some sort of trauma from a past physical or emotional injury. My groin occasionally hurts and pulls me away from presence, and I injured it some 10 years ago playing soccer! Emotional trauma is also stored in the body, and these types of karmas can be hard to release. They are a subtle sort of density that pulls away from the energy I could be devoting to this vast array of Now-experience I keep describing. And this density must be released!
But anyhow, the karma thing could also be thoughts that pull me away from the present. The "you shoulds" and the various obligations of modern society. Perhaps a deadline for a school paper, or waiting to get a pay check from work so I can pay a phone bill, or trying to buy a gift for this occasion or that. Anything that I am expected to do by my culture, my friends, my family. Any agreements I may have made, or intentions that I have set for myself. All of it could continue to haunt me and pull me away from my present experience. And this is where communication comes into play.
Over the past year, I have learned that not only do I have karmas from my past that I need to release, but I can so easily continue to create karmas through my relationships with not just food or my body or my thoughts or emotions, but my relationships with people. If I don't communicate my intentions clearly with people, and make straight forward agreements from the get-go, a karmic calamity could easily ensue. Its happened to me before, and now I do my best to skirt this silliness through the simple setting of clear agreements, with transparent intentions and straight-forward, honest expectations. If something goes wrong somewhere along the way, I do my best to relate that "hey, I've done my best! I am so sorry, I will continue to laser-beam my focus on X _____ agreement." That, or I make a new agreement.
The most important part for me has been simply having the courage to communicate everything clearly from the beginning, and if things go wrong somewhere along the way, having the courage to communicate, clarify, re-agree, and so on. It can be a tough one, but it saves me the annoyance of being pulled out of my present experience because I didn't pay so and so _____ $, or I forgot to call this person or give that person whatever, blah blah. The range of agreements and intentions that can be made are endless. The point is, constantly clarifying agreements and intentions from the get-go and as the process evolves has kept my karmic relations with others pretty clean. Communication is key!
I'm certainly not perfect. I've got plenty of agreements to fulfill now, but I'm doing my best. And this keeps my field of experience free of "oh I supposed to do this," or "Oh my gosh I should be doing that or I haven't done that or fulfilled this!"
I would say that main way I learned this in the past year was through all the different work trades I did, and the hitchkiking and bumming around without any money or a phone to speak of. It can be tough! And it can be fun too. But for me it was really painful if I failed to communicate. When I was honest, and related to people my penniless situation, I was almost always received with smiles and fed and nurtured. Every time I hitchhiked I would say from the beginning just where I was going, with no funny business, and no projecting expectations onto others.
I must say it was quite a journey, and it feels good to have developed some independence and self-sufficiency. But it doesn't mean that my passion for completely transparent communication has ceased in any way.
And I'm still finding balance. I think I can be too direct and intense at times. For instance, when people "you should" me in a conversation without me asking for it, I'm usually quick to point out the utter ridiculously of the statement, or how it generally feels terrible to me to be you should-ed. Like a few weeks back I was working on an art project, and someone said "you should put more love into that." To which I responded, "Hah! I should what? What should I do? Should shouldy shouldness?"
Wow, that word just lost all meaning for a second. I'm not even sure I spelled it correctly anymore. Well, the point is, even in the simplest of communications, subtle karmas arise and I am quick to pull off the disguise. The you-shoulds, the expectations, the energies that we subject each other to can be a karma that continues to arise in our reality lest we stand up for ourselves and strike it down before it takes on a life of its own.
That we may all communicate clearly and honestly, using our word in the pursuit of Truth, Joy, Love, Gratitude, & Righteousness.
What do all these words mean to you anyways?
To me they eventually mean zero-point. No karma, just a vast, multisensory experience, all happening at once. Pure present awareness, completely immersed in the fullness of beingness, the fullness that is this life.
I can't fully express love if I'm always thinking about this karma or farting because of whatever hamburger or milkshake. It's difficult for me to be fully in my truth (or my version of truth) if I haven't taken the time to express my intentions to them! Yes, these types of things.
So Karma. That we may burn up all of the karmas that limit our experience in all its beauty. That we may become expert vampire slayers, cosmic karmic destroying warriors, battling the demons within in the full pursuit of righteousness. That we may drop all the programs that keep our operating system from running at full capacity, and that we may continue to upgrade our operating system (our awareness, our conscious experience) more and more every day. & that we may enjoy the process along the way. :)
Welp, hope it wasn't too much blah blah. I love you all. Stay free, stay clear, en-joy!
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